Listen up, Bachelor and Bachelorette contestants: OG Trista Sutter knows why your relationships are falling apart weeks after you leave the dating show — and it has a lot to do with your desire to continue down the reality TV show path.
Trista was the first Bachelorette, way back in 2003, and she met her current husband Ryan Sutter, a hot and sweet fireman who stole her heart, thanks to the show. Trista and Ryan are still together and have two young children, which kind of makes her an authority on what reality TV show couples should and shouldn't do to help make their union last long after cameras stop rolling.
Her number-one piece of advice, which she shared with Today.com? Stay far away from other reality TV shows.
Whenever I hear of people going on 'Dancing With the Stars' right after, it's heartbreaking to me. It is a really short period of time, and you are in a bubble. For six, eight, 10 weeks — however long you're filming. For us, it was six. So that's all you're focused on. You can't watch television, you're not allowed to be on email, you can't talk to friends and family, you're not at your job every day, you're not playing in your sports leagues or whatever you do as a hobby. You're just solely focused on developing these relationships.
More from The Stir: Trista Sutter Disses 'The Bachelorette' for a Very Good Reason
Once roses have been given and a bit of fame has been felt, Sutter says some contestants get swept up in the glamour of it all and tend to forget their focus should be on the relationship that they worked so hard to find in the first place.
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If you're thinking: Wait a minute, wasn't Sutter on Dancing With the Stars? -- you're right, but the 42-year-old explains why her situation was different: "I was on the very first season, but it was after we had been together for years. We practiced maybe two times a week, like a couple of hours of practice, and it wasn't even close to what they're having to do now. They did two dances the second show this season! And that takes so much practice when it's something that is completely foreign."
You could argue that it's easy for Sutter to say all of this — she and Ryan have always seemed like the most compatible couple on earth -- but I like that she's stressing how important it is to put in the work for the result. You can feel passionately about your partner, but if you aren't making the time to really get to know him/her instead of using your star power to further a short-lived career in reality TV, you probably aren't going to get very far.
As for upcoming Bachelor Ben Higgins, Trista says she has met him and she approves — but that the female contestants vying for his heart shouldn't act "catty" and should maybe even be open to the idea of becoming friends with one another.
Being that Trista was the very first Bachelorette, I firmly believe she should create a Bachelor spin-off show in which she and Ryan offer couples' guidance for the show's winners. Lord knows some of them could use it.
Images via Splash News